April Fool’s Day has come a little early to Overwatch 2. Players will likely find that giant googly eyes have been strapped to every hero’s face and that Blizzard has released a set of absolutely ridiculous patch notes. Here are all the April Fool’s Day patch notes in Overwatch 2, listed.
Overwatch 2’s April Fool’s Day Patch Notes, Listed
Many of these patch notes are incredibly silly. But I’d be lying if I didn’t say I wish some of these were real. Imagine a flying Reinhardt. Imagine being able to teleport as Reaper without being locked in that dumb cross-armed animation.
Be brave, Blizzard. Let us have these dumb changes permanently. Bring them to competitive. Let chaos reign.
OVERWATCH 2 WIP VERY SERIOUS PATCH NOTES – DRAFT – DO NOT PUBLISH
DEVELOPER NOTE – TEST PATCH
These changes are only being applied to Arcade Mode for the moment, because Aaron Keller claims he can convene with Pachimari, and they told him to make this patch. He only plays the new arcade modes, so he shouldn’t notice otherwise.
HERO UPDATES
All Heroes
- All heroes have new Ultimate Voice Lines
- Keep 50% of Ultimate Charge when swapping heroes
Developer Comment: Veteran players have an advantage over newer ones when it comes to voice line recognition. In order to level the playing field, we’ve written and recorded new Ultimate voice lines for every hero.
To help players learn these new callouts, we’ve also increased the amount of Ultimate charge retained when swapping heroes.
Tank Role Passive
- Gain Ultimate charge 10% faster
- The hero that gets the final blow on a tank gains a significant amount of ultimate charge
Developer Comment: Tank heroes are the raid bosses of teams. You should be fairly rewarded for defeating them, right?
Damage Role Passive
- Heal 50 health on elimination
Developer Comment: It’s frustrating when you dive the backline by yourself and get no healing, especially when your team’s support heroes are busy respawning. This change should help keep you alive, at least.
Support Role Passive
- Gain 30% increased movement speed for 4 seconds when reaching low health
Dev Comment: It’s tough to stay alive when flankers are about. This change should even out the odds a bit when you get ambushed. Please don’t use this offensively.
TANK
DOOMFIST
Developer Comment: The empowered Fist can also level a skyscraper or open a glass jar in a single attempt.
Seismic Slam
- Can be empowered by Power Block
- Damage increased from 50 to 75 when empowered
- Enemies hit by the shockwave are launched into the air
D.VA
Developer Comment: It turns out the beams used to destroy projectiles also really hurt when used on people.
Defense Matrix
- After deflecting a projectile, Defense Matrix deals 30 damage to enemies within its area of effect over 1 second
- Defense Matrix killing blows grant an additional 5% Ult Charge
JUNKER QUEEN
Developer Comment: Junker Queen yells so loud she damages the eardrums of her foes. Don’t worry though, it’s still a “friendly shout of encouragement” for her allies.
Commanding Shout
- Applies a bleed to enemies in range when activated
ORISA
Developer Comment: It is believed that the threat of Orisa’s aerial body slam is the biggest crime deterrent in Numbani.
Javelin Spin
- While in the air, Javelin Spin pulls Orisa forward in her facing direction
Fortify
- Increases falling speed and deals damage in an area when Orisa lands on the ground
RAMATTRA
Developer Comment: Ramattra is a lot more effective when he’s in Nemesis Form, so he’ll stay like that until everyone has suffered as much as he has.
- Omnic Form Disabled
- Ramatta is now always in Nemesis Form
- Bonus armor decreased from 225 to 125
Void Barrier
- Moved to Ability 1
Block
- Now has a 1 second cooldown when disengaged
REINHARDT
Reinhardt Comment: I COULDN’T CHARGE THE ENEMIES THAT WERE IN THE AIR SO I ASKED TORBJORN TO HELP ME OUT. NOW I AM THE ULTIMATE CRUSHING MACHINE, EVEN IN THE SKY!!!!!
Charge
- Now grants flight. Hold Jump to float up and Crouch to go down
- Steering increased by 33%
ROADHOG
Developer Comment: In order to further align Roadhog as a tank who punishes bad positioning, we’ve increased the range of Hook to make all positioning bad positioning.
Chain Hook
- Range increased by 50%
SIGMA
Developer Comment: Gravitic energy is quite potent. If it’s strong enough to lift a giant rock, it can lift anyone.
Accretion
- Enemies hit by the impact are knocked back and experience low gravity for 4 seconds
- Cooldown decreased from 10 to 8 seconds
WINSTON
Dev Comment: Winston!
Winston?
- Winston!
WRECKING BALL
Developer Comment: Wrecking Ball unleashes his signature moves that made him the Champion of the Scrapyard battle arena.
Grappling Claw
- Maximum speed is temporarily increased when bouncing off walls
Minefield
- Mines slowly move toward nearby enemies
ZARYA
Dev Comment: Gravity gravitates. That’s just science!
Graviton Surge
- Moves towards Zarya after deploying.
Particle Cannon
- Self-knockback on secondary fire scales with Energy level.
DAMAGE
ASHE
Dev Comment: In order to be more accurate to the fantasy, Dynamite fire now spreads between players.
Dynamite
- Fire spreads to nearby enemies up to 4 times
BASTION
Developer Comment: Bastion downloaded a software update, upgrading “Configuration: Assault” and allowing it to simulate his old “Configuration: Tank”
Configuration: Assault
- While active, Tactical Grenade has a 0.5 second cooldown
CASSIDY
Developer Comment: Cassidy can dodge anything using his cat-like reflexes. It’s a bit rough on his spine, though.
Combat Roll
- Now costs regenerating stamina instead of having a cooldown
- Dodge all damage when Combat Roll is active
- Ammo reloaded decreased from 6 to 2
ECHO
Developer Comment: Echo now uses more of her fingers when shooting enemies.
Tri Shot
- Now fires 2 additional projectiles
- Damage per projectile decreased from 17 to 12
GENJI
Developer Comment: Spamming a voice line for healing finally does something after everyone else has tuned you out!
- Sometimes Genji heals himself when requesting healing
HANZO
Developer Comment: Hanzo spent many years mastering the bow and geometry to pull off this feat. It DEFINITELY has nothing to do with magic.
Storm Arrow
- Storm arrows ricochet toward the Sonic Arrow
JUNKRAT
Developer Comment: Junkrat was a bit careless when packing his grenades, so now they spill out of his pockets whenever he knocks himself back.
Total Mayhem
- Drop grenades when launching yourself with Concussion Mine
MEI
Developer Comment: We noticed a decrease in Mei players helping their team “group up” in spawn with Ice Wall. This is core to Mei’s gameplay, so we added additional ice pillars to help facilitate it.
Ice Wall
- Spawns more pillars and has slightly different configurations
PHARAH
Developer Comment: Rocket Jump? Sounds dangerous. But it is a viable means of travel when you can’t afford enough fuel.
Rocket Launcher
- Rockets deal no self-damage and have increased knockback
Barrage
- Pharah can be knocked back while Barrage is active
- Barrage rockets now have self-knockback
Hover Jets
- Fuel decreased by 33%
Related: All of Roadhog’s Catch-A-Mari Nicknames for Overwatch 2’s Heroes
REAPER
Developer Comment: After getting shot one too many times, Reaper no longer poses in place before teleporting despite it looking very cool.
Shadow Step
- Movement is no longer locked after confirming a teleport location
SOJOURN
Developer Comment: Sojourn hasn’t been performing quite up to our expectations after reducing her one-shot potential. To remedy this, we’ve added a very fair stun to her kit
Power Slide
- Now impacts enemies dealing 75 damage, launching them upward, and knocking them down for 1.5 seconds
SOLDIER: 76
Developer Comment: Why leave it on the ground when you can keep it in your pocket instead?
Biotic Field
- Now attached to Soldier: 76 when activated
SOMBRA
Developer Comment: As a safety measure, the Translocator will forcibly separate solid objects that have been teleported into each other. Unfortunately, this process is also quite painful.
Translocator
- Now deals 120 damage in an area at the teleport destination.
- Projectile speed increased from 25 to 40
- Cooldown decreased from 10 seconds to 6 seconds
SYMMETRA
Developer Comment: It turns out there was a setting on Sentry Turrets that let’s them immediately target enemies when thrown! Symmetra estimates this change increases their efficiency by 32.33%…repeating, of course!
Sentry Turret
- Turrets can now target enemies while in-flight
- Turrets have 60% damage resistance before sticking to terrain
TORBJÖRN
Dev Comment: We noticed that Torbjorn relies a little too heavily on his turret to deal consistent damage, so you won’t believe this one simple balance change that fixes that and makes him 1000% overpowered!
Overload
- Now also causes Rivet Gun and Forge Hammer to ignite enemies, dealing 30 additional damage over time
TRACER
Developer Comment: Tracer now leaves a vacuum when she Recalls into the past. We are pretty sure this is how time travel works and will be taking no questions.
Recall
- Pulls in nearby enemies when activated
Pulse Bomb
- Arming time increased from 1 second to 2 seconds
WIDOWMAKER
Developer Comment: Poisonous bullets don’t work as quickly as normal ones do, but at least there’s more room for counterplay.
Widow’s Kiss
- Critical hits deal their damage over 3 seconds as poison
- Widowmaker can see poisoned enemies through walls
SUPPORT
ANA
Developer Comment: Turns out whatever is in those syringes hurts a lot more when applied to the forehead.
Biotic Rifle
- Can now headshot enemies
BAPTISTE
Developer Comment: Rumor has it that Baptiste is the record holder for both high and long jump.
Exo Boots
- Jumping with Exo Boots has more horizontal distance, scaling with the charge amount
- Hold Jump after using Exo Boots to keep bouncing
BRIGITTE
Developer Comment: Whip Shot now whips YOU! Works better if you say, “wheeeeee” while flailing about.
Whip Shot
- Brigitte is pulled towards the flail head
KIRIKO
Dev Comment: Kanezaka is a big town and Kiriko has lots of protecting to do. This change should help her get to where she needs to go in a timely fashion, especially during rush hour.
Swift Step
- Range increased from 35 to 350m
- Cooldown now scales with distance traveled
LÚCIO
Developer Comment: We were alerted that Soundwave was able to knock back entire heroes but couldn’t do anything to projectiles. We’ve corrected this logical inconsistency.
Soundwave
- Now deflects projectiles
- Cooldown decreased from 4 to 3 seconds
MERCY
Developer Comment: Our stats show that the “Battle Mercy” playstyle isn’t as common as we hoped. Here’s a small change that should nudge her damage potential in the right direction.
Caduceus Blaster
- Ammo increased from 25 to 125
- Projectile speed increased from 50 to 125
MOIRA
Developer Comment: You know that random Orb that killed you from across the map? That was 100% intentional. Biotics Orbs follow Moira’s every command, though they only understand “Stop” and “Go.”
Biotic Orb
- Pressing the ability input while Biotic Orbs are active causes them to stop or start moving
ZENYATTA
Developer Comment: Zenyatta calls this technique the “Flying Kick,” but since he’s always floating should it just be called “Kick”?
Snap Kick
- Launches Zenyatta in his facing direction when used in the air
Even with this new patch in the Arcade, you’re still going to need to aim. Check out this comprehensive guide on the best crosshair settings for all Overwatch heroes: Best Crosshair Settings in Overwatch 2.